NASA Astronauts Rescue Nigerian Woman Stranded in Space for 500 Years
In what is being hailed as the most bizarre intergalactic humanitarian mission since the Apollo era, a team of NASA astronauts has successfully retrieved a Nigerian woman who claims to have been floating aimlessly through the cosmos for the past five…
Breaking News: Adolf Hitler Reportedly Dead
In a shocking development that has stunned absolutely no one with access to a history book, reports emerging from Europe indicate that former German leader Adolf Hitler has reportedly died. Sources close to the situation say the controversial dictator,…
Federal Government Moves to Regulate BBL as “National Security Concern”
In response to the rising number of failed Brazilian Butt Lift (BBL) procedures among “hot and sexy Nigerian ladies,” the Federal Government has announced plans to establish a new regulatory body to oversee and control the booming backside enhancement…
World Powers Agree to Use Eco-Friendly Weapons for World War III
Say conflict must now comply with global sustainability targets In what diplomats are calling a “historic step for climate responsibility,” leaders of the world’s most heavily armed nations have reportedly agreed that the upcoming World War III…
Power Minister Apologises for Outages, Says Every Nigerian Will Get a Free Hand Fan
In an emotional address broadcast live on national television last night — powered, ironically, by a loud, smoke-belching diesel generator — the Honourable Minister of Power tendered what many are calling “the most sincere non-apology apology of the…
Nigeria Vows to Support Iran with Made in Nigeria Weapons
In a bold move that has left military analysts worldwide scratching their heads and reaching for their history books on medieval warfare, the Nigerian government has officially pledged full support to Iran in its ongoing conflict against the United…
Lagos Set to Install Giant Air-Fresheners in Major Streets to Combat Odour
In a bold move to silence the growing chorus of complaints from frustrated Lagosians about the city’s terrible odor, the Lagos State Government has announced a groundbreaking solution: the installation of giant industrial air fresheners along major…