BREAKING: National Emergency Declared as Omotola Jalade Ekeinde Asked to “Introduce Herself”
Mild panic swept across sections of the entertainment industry yesterday after veteran Nollywood icon Omotola Jalade Ekeinde reportedly walked out of an interview when asked the now-controversial question: “Can you please introduce yourself?”…
Breaking News: A Nigerian Emerges as The New Ayatollah of the Islamic Republic of Iran
TEHRAN – The Iranian Assembly of Experts announced this morning that Chief (Dr.) Chinedu Al-Bakare, a 54-year-old serial entrepreneur and part-time “Chief Launcher” from Onitsha, has been officially sworn in as the new Ayatollah of the…
Elon Musk Announces 10-Year Plan to Build Highway from Earth to the Moon
In what experts are calling “the boldest traffic congestion solution in human history,” billionaire innovator Elon Musk has officially begun construction of a super highway bridge connecting Earth directly to the Moon. Speaking at a press conference,…
Nigerian Scientist Invents Machine That Converts Leaves to Money
In what experts are already calling “the end of sweeping compounds for free,” a Nigerian scientist has unveiled a revolutionary machine capable of converting ordinary leaves into spendable cash. The inventor, identified simply as “Dr. Chuks from…
Job Opening: Iran Advertises Ayatollah Role With $1m Daily Salary, “Short But Impactful Career Path Guaranteed”
The Islamic Republic of Iran has officially opened applications for the role of Supreme Ayatollah to the general public – no prior experience required, just “strong leadership qualities and a healthy relationship with destiny.” This comes amid…
Newly Married Couples Spend Quality Time Together Bonding With their Phones
In what experts are calling “a revolutionary shift in romance,” newly married couples across the country are reportedly spending more quality time together – by individually bonding with their phones. The trend, now unofficially dubbed Digital…
Investigative journalist David Hundeyin set to publish a 500,000-page book claiming that 99 percent of Nigerians are CIA agents.
In what experts are already calling “the most ambitious investigative project in Nigeria’s history,” Nigerian investigative journalist David Hundeyin has reportedly completed a manuscript for a 500,000-page book claiming that 99% of Nigerians are…
How I Became a Brain Surgeon After 3 Days of Intensive Online Training
It all started on a Tuesday afternoon when I realized two things: Life is short and Data is cheap. By Tuesday evening, I had enrolled in a highly prestigious, globally recognized, absolutely legitimate online course titled: “Neurosurgery Mastery: From…
Elon Musk Vows to Marry a Nigerian Girl as He Starts Hunting for One
Billionaire tech entrepreneur and owner of Tesla Motors and X, Elon Musk, has said he is seriously considering marrying a woman from Nigeria. He revealed this during a live television interview with CNN. He said that since childhood, he has always loved…
Economic Hardship Pauses Briefly Out of Respect as Bola Ahmed Tinubu Boards Flight to United Kingdom
Nigeria’s ongoing economic hardship reportedly took a brief, dignified pause Monday morning as President Bola Ahmed Tinubu boarded his flight to the United Kingdom for a state visit. Eyewitnesses confirm that inflation, fuel scarcity, and the…
